Windows House XP

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Windows House XP was an operating system for the physical house that you lived in, based on Windows XP.

From the beginning, it had security issues. As you keyed in your security code to enter, the voice intended to confirm your code would shout out the numbers for anyone to hear, at the same time calling telephone numbers at random and giving out the code. It would also flash inside lights on and off so that the house could be identified. Any attempt to change the code would not be allowed. House XP would also automatically open all windows and doors for ventilation after you left the house. Plus it would cheerily chant "Elvis has left the building!" over and over whenever a resident departed.

The other major problem with House XP was that it made your house incompatible with older infrastructure and older houses in the neighborhood. It would make your pipe connections larger or smaller so that they no long attached to the local water supply or sewers. It would no long accept electricity as that was now incompatible with House XP. If any appliance was connected to a long extension cord, it would be sent out to attack the nearest house.

Microshit Windows House XP was a MASSIVE flop. All the tiny little bad bits on the Apple ihouse were copied. The two floor was converted to a bungalow and worst of all the doors often crashed, leaving you in a room for 12 hours with a massive 404 error printed on your wall. House XP would eventually cause a house to implode into itself so that nothing was left. Microsoft stock went up 25% when this was discovered, since users could not provide proof they had a house in the first place in order to sue Microsoft.

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