User:I forgot/Troll

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The open Internet has been undergoing upheaval for the past, oh,... however long it was since it began. During these times of struggle, the trolls have been the fertile soil covering the anchor that ties the tyranny of the sysop to the bedrock of pablum. They have been the core of the rotten, half-eaten apple that is the court of public opinion. They have come into ports (from the lowliest dock to the largest marina) to find unsteady and degrading work in the electronic marketplace of ideas.

These are their stories.

February 3, 1975, or thereabouts[edit]

The first troll rises out of the ocean. Being the first of his kind, he has none of the wisdom that would be passed verbally to his descendants. His spelling is shaky, and he hasn't quite got the hang of dangling the sophisticated ruses that today's trolls employ.

“u are da lemsn. i gets u flekcs sa da.”

~ Jeffrey Barberspate[1]
  1. In those days, the strategy of posting anonymously had not been conceived of. Everyone used their real names.