From Wackypedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

TikTok is a social media platform for short videos. It may or may not be a diving platform, depending.

Perfect for goldfish.

Earlier, the Vine site was the place to go to for short (very short) videos that users could post. It proved to be so popular that owner Twitter shut it down and is now trying to wring out every last penny out of the remaining content. This was noticed by some guys in China, who decided they could rip off the concept. After all, nobody watched YouTube anymore since most of their content exceeded the average 8-9 second attention span of most humans online and goldfish. So tell me why again I'm still writing this when most readers have bugged out already? Damn goldfish.

TikTok was launched in China after the government had built in their backdoors and spyware. It proved very popular with foolish people who thought they could post anything they wanted, and with government officials who could track down and imprison anybody posting stuff they didn't like. The international version was named TikTok and launched in 2017.

The site has been a magnet for criticism by people who have never seen the 4chan /b/ board. No less than China has protested content on TikTok, since the bots that run the site changed all the government access codes "accidentally". Then-US-president Donald Trump banned TikTok as being a threat to America's puppet shows. Weirdos from both ends of the spectrum have also squawked from their caves. Pakistan and Kanye West have also picked fights with the site because Pakistan and because Kanye West. North Korea is hoping to build its first internet connection so that it, too, can threaten TikTok.

Nonetheless, TikTok remains extremely popular with Pedo Bears, ISIS recruiters, viral advertisers, Truthers and all kinds of wackos providing the bulk of the content. The under-10 crowd and older humans who are all to easily amused are immensely entertained, thus proving the classic Roman "bread and circuses" concept. Still, after actually examining the content, the shocked bots that run TikTok decided to censor themselves to try to make everyone happy. Today, there are only 5 videos on the site, all of a poodle chasing a ball in somebody's kitchen.