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One - Two
New 'uns at top of the list below, homeboy.
- ... CAPTCHA is asking you how many traffic lights you are seeing?
- ... it's time? For what, I don't know. I'm only the messenger.
- ... that, each year, more people eat cheesecake than killer bees?
- ... if you were a mosasaur, you'd be too extinct to finish reading this section?
- ... it's time for the Manson Family reunion and picnic? Run.
- ... that the darkest hour is just before... oh, wait. We're THE BAD GUYS! And WE'RE WINNING!!! We are the champions, my friend... Hooyah! Hooyah!
- ... that there is no Death: you are merely reconnecting with your environment.
- ... that sharks continually regrow new teeth, making your new career as a shark dentures salesperson a complete joke?
- ... that exempt for turtles, humans are the the only animal that can proofread?
- ... that dinosaurs are playing with firecrackers inside the hollow Earth?
- ... that it's time?
- ... that if you have a song in your heart, it must now be in a compatible format?
- ... in a race between a sloth and continental drift, the sloth wins only 16% of the time?
- ... it took a real long time, but somebody finally gave light a speeding ticket.
- ... that leaving no stone unturned means including Mick and Keith?
- ... that the US Open is a lie and closes after 9PM? How's someone going to get a hot dog and a drink then?
- ... that confuzzlement is its own reward?
- ... that Leo Tolstoy began writing War and Peace on Wackypedia's DidYouKnow but quit after failing to grasp HTML tags?
- ... that that's that and not a ziggurat?
- ... All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.
- ... that the exact date can be figured by the length of day, so long as you have a long enough ruler to do the measurement?
- ... that a pie in the face is worth two in the bush?
- ... the hoover was invented by Henry Vacuum Cleaner?
- ... that eating spaghetti while riding a roller coaster is not a good idea? Ask me how I know.
- ... that lightning never strikes twice in the same place unless it does just that?
- ... the lunatics have taken over the asylum? That means I get to choose meatloaf for dinner!
- ... that I know you knew ten minutes before I wrote this that I would write this? And I knew it ten minutes before you even thought that?
- ... that I'm Barry Scott?!! I'm here to tell you that Cillit Bang gets those tough mayo stains out of your sink, and not just on Cinco de Mayo!
- ... that orange is the new orange? Again.
- ... I have pants made of live ostriches and I'm not afraid to use it?
- ... that colorless ideas may sleep furiously, but only Elon Musk can snore in pinkness while the entire world is awake?
- ... that on 4 December 1857, in northern Canada, shit happened?