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"It's a TRAP!!! ~ Admiral Ackbar on tacos with crispy shells.

A taco is stuff kinda wrapped in a small tortilla or two. And that's the whole problem right there.

Now 'Mercans seem to all get their tacos with crispy shells. One bite and they crack it or more likely, even shatter it. The insides fall on them or fly all over the place with the result that the amount eaten is about a third of what was originally inside the taco. Then, for the rest of the day or night, they get to hear, "I see you had tacos for lunch/dinner." A dirty shirt or blouse may be a badge of courage for not losing an eye or ear from a flying tortilla shard, but consider the feelings of whoever does the laundry.

And what about the restaurants that buy pre-made crispy shells? A large number will be broken in shipping and never see a plate or takeout bag. They don't want complaints about broken taco shells that nonetheless are going to just get broken in a heartbeat anyway. Restaurant workers try to do their best and make tacos with their eyes closed, as just one look can make them shatter. The broken ones are saved up and sent to artisans overseas, who fashion crispy shell pieces into triangles for Doritos.

Troops scatter taco shells as a defense against any attackers. All the enemy has to do is walk within a foot of one and the snapping sound of a cracking shell will alert defenders and bring a hail of automatic weapons fire. However, the collateral deaths of hungry goats, camels and Taco Bell fans is incredibly high.

Eat me[edit]