Steak

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Jesus died on one, according to Jehovah's Witnesses.

~ Tamia

When someone said, "Steaks for everyone," I should have known it was too good to be true.

~ Jesus

I'll have the Porterhouse, medium rare with onions and a baked... wait... I'm a COW!!! What am I doing??!! AAAAAAAA!

~ a cow

I'll have the same only with a side salad with vinaigrette. It's nobody I know.

~ other cow

YOU CALL THIS A BLOODY STEAK, YOU WANKER???!!! DO YOU EXPECT ANYONE TO EAT THIS??!!!

~ Gordon Ramsay

No, I don't, because that's a rat you're waving around. I think it's got rabies, too.

~ Emeril Lagasse

It's Steak Night at Golden Corral! And we've brought out the chainsaws and magnifying glasses just for you!

~ TV advertisement