Peasant

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Well, it's a living, until it isn't anymore.

Do you:

  • constantly refer to other people as "milord" or "milady"?
  • pride yourself on your ability to grovel and be humiliated?
  • find yourself on your knees more often than not?
  • have suppressed revolutionary thoughts while slurping your cold gruel?
  • get constantly kicked in the butt by an evil overseer?

If the answer is yes to all or most of the above, then you're a peasant!

It matters not if you are working out in the fields from sunup to sundown or sitting behind a desk shoving numbers around in a huge corporate building where you have to raise your hand to get permission to pee. In either case, your ability to multitask is what defines you. After all, you are able to quickly switch from menial tasks to sheer drudgery at a moment's notice. Plus there's always toil, grinding, grunt work, travail and bonus chores to look forward to. And it all makes the milliseconds pass by like hours. And others have the gall to speak of the futility of life. Ha.

Offended? You're offended? I'm so very sorry! Of course, I meant that you were a pheasant.

Captain of the guard, take this pheasant outside and shoot it, then have it stuffed and put on the roof as an example to the other pheasants.