New Mexico

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Damn grey alien drunk drivers!

There's something about New Mexico that I just can't put my finger on.

I mean, there's all kinds of great scenery. There's even a place called Pie Town.

It might be that New Mexico is big on call centers. New Mexicans have readily learned the the thick Indian or Filipino accents required for such work. But ending every sentence with "or what" tips off callers that they are calling New Mexico. But this means that anyone you meet on the street will talk like a call center operator, asking you stupid questions and having you repeat or spell out things forever and ever.

And Los Alamos labs is there, figuring out how to blow up the world in bigger and better ways. This has attracted a huge numbers of people looking forward to end times/Armageddon. And they all work at the laboratory, hoping to be the first ones to see the end of the world, if not to start it themselves. Can you say "oopsie"?

And then there's all this stuff about space aliens. New Mexico doesn't have that big of a population, but just try and find a parking place with all the UFOs taking up all the good spots. And those grey aliens are really stuck up and laugh at you behind your back when you pass. But they know all the good burrito places so you just have to put up with that.