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A lonkey is like a donkey, only it looks like a really, really, really LONG KEY!

It gets honked by a sonk. An eeeble sonk.

Ew, a lonkey![edit]

The lonkey is NOT mentioned in any epic tales. Not even The Incredible Adventures of Melville Amsterdam and the Collapsible Ironing Board or its sequel. Nor is it mentioned in the Illogic Book. That is because of people's tendency to say, "Ew, a lonkey!" whenever lonkeys are mentioned. This means that nothing on Illogicopedia can become EPIC if it mentions a lonkey EW, A LONKEY! THIS ARTICLE IS HORRIBLE! I'M GOING TO STOP READING RIGHT NOW!