Liberal

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There's really no such thing as a liberal. It's just an insult used to describe people who are only slightly less conservative than you. Since you can't just kill them because you need to save up ammo for the end times, you have to have some way of venting, and calling people liberals is it. It used to mean people who weren't totally selfish, but we all know there's nobody like that anymore. Plus you know what happened to people back then like Gandhi. You sure don't see do-gooders walking around in their adult diapers anymore as a result.

Besides, everybody important is descended from the good old Pilgrims, who were righteously intolerant of everyone who wasn't another Pilgrim, as God decreed. After being helped by Indians and Quakers to survive, did you think they thanked those do-gooders? Hell, no! They shot them full of holes until they ran out of ammo. Too bad they did. So, kid, did you family come over on the Mayflower, too?

What, you're a librarian? Almost the same thing. Reading is the Devil's handiwork. Move along, right now.