So I went to see this movie called Inception.
I didn't understand anything that was going on and soon fell asleep. I had this dream where Leonardo DiCaprio was trying to tell me I should wake up and go the lobby to get a supersize Coke, supersize popcorn, lots of candy and a hot dog. In the dream, I tried to explain to Leo that my credit card was maxed out. But he told me that there was E-Z credit in the Dream World and I could get a no-limit credit card right away. So after signing some document in my blood, I had my new card just like that. Dream World, remember?
So I went to the food counter and there was Leo again at the register. I gotta say that this was some food stand. It had pheasant under glass, foie gras, beluga caviar. Of course, they were at theater prices as you might expect. But I had my new card so I loaded up. They even had bottles of Romanée-Conti wine, so I got two.
Suddenly, Leo came out of nowhere and said he'd help me carry all my stuff back to the theater. So he grabbed all of it and I followed him through the doors. But when I walked through, there was this giant building complex in the snow, guarded by soldiers, with Leo telling me I had to fight for my snacks. Okay, so we got into this big shootout and we're killing guys left and right. Then, I saw Jar Jar Binks running away down a corridor! WTF? I chased him, because I really hate that MF. Leo was trying to stop me, but I wasn't listening. I chased him and I got him cornered, then I managed to drown Jar Jar in the ocean.
Right then, I came to and I was in the bathroom of some airliner. The pilot was dead with his head in the toilet. There was a knock on the door and it was Leonardo DiCaprio. He said "Welcome to the Mile High Club". I started to feel cold.
Without warning, I woke up in the ice bin of the multiplex with the theater staff yelling at me about eating all the snacks and ordering $15,000 worth of beluga caviar that I never got to eat. I realized this was all a setup. Well played, Leo, well played.