I forgot to remember to breathe
I forgot to remember to breathe so now I'm a ghost haunting a 7-11. It's not even the one I used to go to all the time; I don't know how that works.
At first it was all about pwning customers and workers, but that got old pretty quickly. There were never any good screamers over here. There was one girl who I thought was really hot, so I popped open the safe for her when she forgot the code to get a roll of quarters. She just grabbed all the cash and I never saw her again.
Now I play the "good" ghost, rising up out a wienie to scare a customer from buying it when it's been in the roaster for too long. I even made it into one of those ghost hunter shows, making sure to trip everyone's equipment and stuff. Now it's embarrassing enough to be a gassy ghost where my farts can be heard everywhere. But one of those investigators called them EVPs that supposedly said things like "I'm going to kill you" (too many nachos, probably) and "Death". No respect from those dudes.