French Southern and Antarctic Territories

From Wackypedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

French Southern and Antarctic Territories (French: Terres australes et antarctiques françaises, aka TAAF). Sounds pretty grand, no? Your imagination immediately gives you images of sweeping fields of snow and huge silent forests. Naaaaah. This is just a bunch of rocks owned by France in God-knows-where and they're not even remotely close to each other.

No sane human lives here or ever would. There are human visitors in the form of scientists and military personnel. The latter are apparently advisors to the factions of seagulls, penguins and walruses constantly fighting over a collection of jagged rocks trying to pass themselves off as islands.

So why bother with places like this? Each island is surrounded by exclusive zones for fishing, not that anyone is really keeping track out there. And here are the places where a key ingredient of French cuisine dwells – the kraken. It turns out that the phrase "Release the kraken!" is actually originally French. When kraken is ordered at a French restaurant, a waiter hands a diner a sword or laser weapon, the maitre d' announces : «Libérer le kraken!», and the fight is on. The winner gets to eat the loser, which is the kraken more often than not.