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Part of the United Kingdom

England flag.jpg Xvdvdvd.JPG
(Flag) (Coat of Arms)
Motto: "God Save the Weed" (de facto)
Anthem: Pass the Dutchie on the Left Hand Side
Capital Manchestoh
Largest city Watford
Official languages English, Scouse, Germanese
Government HP Sauce
National Hero(es) Barry Scott, Richard Hammond
Currency Pound stealing
Religion British
Population Too many to count[1]
Area 5cm2
Population density Denser than a rock
Ethnic groups Diverse
Major exports David Bowie
Major imports Morrisons
National animal Mondonkey
Favourite pastime Cricket, Football
Opening hours All day except teatime (12AM-12PM)
Internet tld .eng
Calling code 999 ½

England are by far the best at everything, but easily get tired of being the being the best and have to rest.

It's boring being brilliant.

~ Jeremy Clarkson English people sometimes eat their toes.

... Or at least that's their justification for losing at everything including Rock Paper Scissors, cricket, Tiddlywinks and Digging holes in the road and filling them in again. The latter usually results in a resounding win for rivals Scotland.

England and Englishmen are often referred to, by foreigners and other misinformed propaganda-fed individuals, as Britain and the British. This is incorrect - sadly the typically viewed Brit (stereotypical Brit) has little or nothing to with the Scottish, the Irish, the Welsh or even the potato famine. I implore you to use the word Britain in place of England. Er, I mean....

Say it with me now[edit]

  • England Good.
  • Britain Bad.
  • Four legs better.

Question for foreigners (Especially Australians)[edit]

How come England is so small, yet the the same amount of people live in London (One city) as the whole of Aussie? England is the best country in the world!

Because half our country is desert and people living there would not be able to stand the heat, wouldn't be able to grow crops or keep livestock. --Ryan ~ U T C ~ 02:48, 16 Jeremy 2008 (UTC)
Also, a lot of people seem to think the whole of England=London. But anyway, I dunno why some of these pages end up being discussions. -- Newforum.png Hindleyak  Converse?blogClick here! 19:31, 18 Yoon 2008 (UTC)

And now, a message from the monarch of England...[edit]

England IS the capital of the world: we invented football, we invented beef, we invented Mexico, we control everything. But recently, on July 4th, 1865, the Ameraccoons have been breaking out of English grip. This is why we must crush the infidels with our tank. Our tanks are better than your tanks.

~ The Queen after a few too many pints

Final thoughts from Skin head™[edit]


~ Skin head™

Skin head, is a logo and symbol of the England company and is not to be reproduced by any other in any possible way EVER. That said, have a nice day


  1. Some claim it has to be less than 60,000,000 (see the population of the United Kingdom), however several people in England claim that it is not, and that other places have negative population (like maybe Wales).

See also[edit]