Dream

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Dreaming about unicycles is a normal and common activity. Dreaming about carnival bumper cars means death, however.

“I dreamed that Phyllis Hyman was slain in a battle with the Flying SpaghettiO's Monster”

Are you dreaming right now or not?

After all, you could have just dreamed you woke up this morning and are actually still dreaming. There's a way to find out, though. Did you see the movie Inception? You didn't? Okay, I'll give you some time to watch it. Hmmm mmm mmm. Okay, what did you think? Wait. You were probably checking out your phone during the whole thing, amirite? Agh. Go back and actually watch the movie.

Now, the takeaway from that flick is that there are dreams within dreams within dreams. So, maybe you need to check the carpet quality to see where you really are. But that only works if you are in someone else's dream and if you're not outdoors or are obsessed with linoleum. That's the other thing, that you could be just along for the ride in somebody else's dream. Like the movie said, you could try killing yourself, but you won't wake up on the next level and will be dead. And no Leonardo DiCaprio.

In the end, don't worry about trying to be in reality because there's no such thing. The waffle irons and other machines that rule the Matrix make sure that you'll probably never know exactly where you are. Just ignore the glitches and pretend that you didn't notice. Plus, you might get extra virtual Snickers in your feeding trough for playing along.

Zzzzzz[edit]