DNA

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DNA is shorthand for Doofusified Negligent Asstard.

It is regarded as the building block of life. DNA is called that for a good reason, as it is the complex chemical that rules us all in our daily lives. And that includes all living things. It makes humans accidentally poke ourselves in the eye, dogs run into mirrors and cats fall off furniture after falling asleep. From amoebas setting themselves on fire to trees tripping over their roots and falling over, nothing is immune to the effects of DNA.

Intelligent design states this is all God's punishment for our arrogance. That may well be, but trees are all Buddhists, so that blows that idea right out of the water. Still, some scientists think DNA gives all of us some kind of excuse for our failings. But DNA is an immutable fact of life, as solid as a stone. And stones aren't even alive and they fall from mountains all the time.