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Crime is when people do eeevil things. Psychologists and psychiatrists believe crime is caused by cheese.

It is. Trust us. Cheese is bad. We see you. Muahahahaha.

And that concludes our article on crime. Thank you for reading.

(We totally haven't implanted a chip in your brain that makes you behave like we want you to behave.)

Note: This is totally not a plan made by an evil genius to destroy the cheese industry. Trust us. Just don't eat cheese, or you'll commit crime. Crime bad.