Cottage is a rare species of highly intelligent fish.
Before the dawn of time, Cottages could literally be found everywhere, all over the multiverse. However, due to the rising popularity of cottage cheese, they're usually only found high in the Himalaya Mountains on planet Earth these days.
The primary use of Cottages are as the sole ingredient of cottage cheese. During holidays, they can also be rented by rich people as mountain guides, unreliable but good natured with a generally unfriendly family.
If so desired, cottages can also be used to start wars with countries such as the Arctic. Their specific role in initiating these wars remains unknown but several chemists are researching it but failing completely. This is probably because most cottages are either in hiding, or are painted dark khaki colours and are virtually invisible in their natural habitat, which they share with politicians and greasy schools of fish.
too bizarre for any version of Uncyclopedia,
but Wackypedia knows how to love random stuff.