Clancy Brown

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Clancy Brown is one of the most EVIL BAD@$$ uber-bad guys on the face of the earth. He is the sworn enemy of Chuck Norris, sidekick of Bob Saget, and disputed to be the third most powerful immortal man on the face of the earth (Behind Chuck Norris and Mr. T). He has held many odd jobs, such as underwater fast food resturant owner, prisoner, evil immortal serial killer, and space astronaut since being banned from television for single-handedly screwing up the otherwise-good Snakes on a Plane. Some say he was the most prolific B-Movie actor of all time.

However, the guy who edited this paragraph in thinks the original page maker is just trying to create someone who is at the same time as cool as Oscar Wilde, Samuel L. Jackson, Master Chief, Solid Snake, Nathan Fillion, Big Boss, and Chuck Norris. The thread-creator failed.

Clancy Brown and Hitler gives kittens drugs and makes them dance, much like Michael Vick makes dogs fight.

Acting career[edit]

Before being banned from acting, he was an average actor in millions of mediocre TV shows and movies, such as Shawshank Redemption, The Highlander, Spongebob, Napoleon Dynamite, and a few low- budget porn flicks. When he dropped the F-Bomb live on the wholesome kids show South Park, he was so disturbed by the heavy criticizm he recieved that his acting went from a C+ do a D- in one day. He screwed up the show he was already working on, and was permanently expelled from the TV industry.

Powers[edit]

Brown cannot die unless he is beheaded by another superhuman. This can only be done by Samuel L. Jackson and Gandalf combined, for all the others have yet to increase their immortality levels. Jackson and Gandalf are also bitter enemies, so this will never happen. He can also fly, kill people by staring at them, and smoke 2 joints while snorting cocaine in both nostrils and drinking Red Bull all at the same time. He also kicks @$$ with a sword.

Where is he now?[edit]

After being banned from acting on or watching TV ever again, he got so angry at the biased, liberal media that he drove a truck full of nuclear powered grenades into the MTV executive office. Instead of killing him, the radiation just gave him the power to shapeshift into a crab. After seeing the dire lack of fast food in the ocean, he opened the Krusty Krab, but the "Krabby Patties" are just a slice of poo between two buns, and nobody likes them. When he is not counting money or swimming in money underwater, he is usually out pwning the losers who just sit at home and play Halo 2 on XBOX 360 and edit Uncyclopedia all day. He says they taste like chicken.