Ceiling Cat
Hey, u hoomanz!
Dis iz Ceiling Cat. Howya doon? N dis is mah abenjing anjel. Say ohai, anjel. No? Sawry, she's kinda shy and lookz liek she's bizzy right dere choppin off teh heds and all. I don't know whay I haff to keep remind u guys, but u still owe me a buncha cheezburgers for keeping tha meteorite from hitting the Earfs. I noes this is before your 30 dayz notice, but I is starvin', Marvin. I tink u guyz know better and maybe itz jes a long line at teh burgerz joint or somefin.
Becuz u do not want Ceiling Cat to loos teh trbl anjel lady upon yur heathen buttz. She gots teh fateful lightnin and a trble swift sword n everting, if ya noes whut ah means. So shake a leg, wouldja? Maybe some fries would be gud.
Plus I was jus wonderin. How comes I gotta talk funny like dis to u guyz, huh? Kthxbai.
PS Sum napkins plz. Kthxbai agin.