Burkina Faso

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Burkina Faso is a country in West Africa that curiously has no burkinas and only a few fasos.

This small nation was called Upper Volta. It was also know as Haute-Volta by its French colonial masters, as its women are really haute. It changed its name in 1984 when there was confusion with the band Mars Volta. Its president at the time, Thomas Sankara, was amazingly progressive for any country, refusing foreign aid with all its strings, planting millions of trees to stop desertification and instituting a national vaccination program. He also made women's rights the law of the land and built up the country's infrastructure. Exactly why someone would do this is a mystery to places like Texas and Florida. And that's why Burkina Faso was never mentioned on the news since nobody was killing anybody else by the millions there.

Since France was resentful of their former colony's success and also coveted the elephants there, it launched a coup in 1987. Now Burkina Faso could proudly take its rightful place in Africa alongside other countries, with constant bloodshed and poverty. Unfortunately, this was not to be since its violence was short-lived and there would not be another coup until 2014. This occurred when police from Ferguson, Missouri (USA) joined with locusts and space aliens to overthrown a government they considered too stable.

For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Burkina Faso, or simply go here.