I wasn't always Basement Cat, you know.
It's just that there's so much great stuff down here, like old comic books. And there's old furniture that I can actually jump on without somebody yelling at me. All your high school yearbooks are down here. Boy, were you a geeky looking kid! Over in the corner is that stationery exercise bike that you never used. What was up with buying that thing, anyway?
So me and Basement Horse are having a really good time down here. Oh, and the creepy voices telling me to go upstairs and sit on your face while you're sleeping? I even like those guys, whatever those things are. And that ouija board that works by itself is really interesting, too. Oh yeah. I also invited the grues upstairs for dinner sometime. I hope you don't mind. The poltergeist ordered a pizza for us so if you could bring it down, we'd all appreciate it. Plus while you're down here, take a look at the dimensional portal that opened up with all kinds of colors and these funny demonic cows that keep popping out.