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Applause is a sound. It sounds like this: *cue applause*. Now you know what applause sounds like.

How Does Applause Happen?[edit]

Applause doesn't "happen." It just is. It's hard to XXXplain. Take a philosophy course.

When Does Applause Happen?[edit]

Applause most normally happens when Pluto is in the third house of Spain, however it has occurred in the fifth house as well.

How To Make Your Own Applause[edit]

Making your own applause is easy, and it makes for a great science fair project. Here are the materials you will need:

  • A spaceship
  • cosmic ray receiver
  • speakers

Here are some you won't need:

  • nuclear waste
  • dialectic diodes
  • chewing gum

Now, get into your spaceship and situate yourself within the seventh house of Jupiter, taking care not to disturb its mystic emanations. Point the cosmic ray receiver out at Alpha Centauri and you will hear applause come from your speakers. A common mistake here is forgetting to hook up the receiver to the speakers. If this is not done, no applause will occur, however you will get Napoleon and possibly Mussolini.

The Origins of Applause[edit]

Applause doesn't have origins, because applause lies in a cyclical existence. Think of it as a mushroom. If you step on a mushroom, it gets squashed, right? That's what applause is like, except without the stepping and the squashing. And without the mushroom.

Mathematical Formula for Applause[edit]

Applause + sugar + water buffalo + Watergate scandal = good-tasting sandwich

Try it out for yourself.

See Also[edit]